So, I walked out of the doors to the Tropical Isle with eight hand grenades, two pairs of voluptuous breasts and a grin.....
A checklist of what you need to have a successful bachelor party.
- A best man or two
- Several crazy party animal friends with little to no morals (or at least capable of suspending the use of moral values.)
- A good party destination that is remote enough to discourage spies sent by the future bride. i.e.- New Orleans, during the Mardi Gras.
- A video camera
- A groom smart enough to stay out of the camera's lens
- Several pounds of really fun beads, (50 lbs. should do nicely)
- Several disposable cameras
- A groom smart enough not to be caught in front of one the cameras with a women's breasts in his mouth.
- Aspirin
- Dollar bills
- The ability to talk enebriated women into removing almost any article of clothing, thus shedding 90% of their dignity, in the middle of the street in trade for a set of $1.99 beads.
- Teddy "Starting in the East" West
- An elementary school teacher.....
- Six chicks from some mid-western state with little to no morals (or at least capable of suspending the use of moral values.) Not that any of them would be engaged or anything......
- Some strings of beads with shot glasses attached to them
- A pharmacist friend, to supply the Mardi Gras Survival Kit
An appetite for gator (alligator)
An appetite for crawfish
A long towel to cover the slats in the bathroom door so, the people who are sharing your hotel room do not have to be exposed to the sounds of excrement and bowel expulsion.
American Express, cuz they don't take Mastercard....
The phone number of the local district attorney and a get out of jail free card
Big freakin' alfalfa pellets or an ultra-high wattage stun gun
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